


Curiosity Killed The Cat/Colonel

by HighlandYorkie



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms, Sherlock Holmes (Downey films)
Genre: Colonel Sebastian Moran - Freeform, Fluff, Gen, Professor James Moriarty - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-02-16
Updated: 2012-02-16
Packaged: 2017-10-31 06:22:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/340926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HighlandYorkie/pseuds/HighlandYorkie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Colonel Sebastian Moran discovers first hand why he shouldn't get bored.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by my fellow Paul Anderson/Colonel Sebastian Moran fans over on Tumblr.
> 
> This will be multi part.

**Curiosity Killed The ~~Cat~~ , Colonel** _  
  
_Colonel Sebastian Moran was bored, no he was beyond bored and into a whole new realm of nothing to do, the sort that usually leads to trouble. The professor had been busy of late with some side secret even from him project and he had not left any instructions for him to eliminate anyone or do anything, he was just told to wait.  
  
 __He had toyed with the idea of going out and randomly picking off some toffs in one of the royal parks but where was the skill or money in that. So instead he spent his days wandering around looking for mischief, like nicking the odd apple from a fruit cart or slitting the braces of some unsuspecting police constable and then watching as hilarity ensued, he’d even stooped so low as pickpocketing just for the hell of it.  
  
But more often than not, which is what he was doing currently, he could be found lounging on the sofa in Professor Moriarty’s private chambers at the university.  
  
Doing nothing is thirsty work and his gaze drifted time and time again to the locked drinks cabinet…now if only he could remember where the professor stashed the key.  
  
“I don’t need no key” he said to the room “I’ll just pick the lock”  
  
With that he got up and walked over where his prize was waiting.  
  
“I’m sure he won’t mind, it’s either this or I sneak into one of the clubs” he sighed because he knew the second he did, word would reach the professor and then there would be hell to pay.  
  
Kneeling so he could see the offending keyhole he pulled out his penknife and started to work.  
  
Within seconds the locked gave a most satisfactory click and the door swung open a little.  
  
It was then that Moran looked around the room, suddenly nervous that the professor was secretly watching him, but there was no-one.  
  
He chuckled to himself and grinned as his eyes fell upon several bottles of the finest spirits.  The thing that really caught his attention more than anything was a smallish bottle that was covered in velvet.  
  
Colonel Moran, picked up the bottle and gave it a gentle shake, the liquid inside made a delightful sloshing noise.  
  
The stopper was quickly removed and he carefully sniffed the contents, whatever spirit lay within the bottle smelled divine….a mix of fruitiness, flowers and something that seemed familiar but he couldn’t quite put his finger on what.  
  
Taking a small tumbler he poured himself a third of a glass…feeling the thrill of getting caught by the professor he gave a slight snigger and downed the contents in one.  
  
If it smelled like heaven on earth, it tasted like hell…it burned worst than the cheapest potcheen thus he coughed violently.  So hard in fact that he soon found himself on his knees his whole body retching, suddenly he felt so stupid…what if he had just drunk poison.  
  
Colonel Sebastian Moran, tried to stand but his legs buckled and he tumbled forward into the cabinet, sending it’s content’s flying….the velvet shrouded bottle smashed against the back of a nearby chair and some of the liquid splashed him, adding insult to injury.  
  
Moran managed to look over to the door to the chambers, hoping that the professor would at least make it a quick painless death.  
  
As this thought formed and faded from his mind so did the room as a blackness enveloped him.  
  
 _Sometime later_  
“Sebastian?”  
  
A hand tapped his cheek  
  
“Sebastian?” the voice was growing impatient  
  
“Colonel Moran” the accompanying slap was hard and his cheek now stung  
  
“Hmm?” he struggled to open his eyes and when he did he wished he hadn’t for there staring down at him disapprovingly was Professor James Moriarty  
  
“P-p-p-professor?”  
  
“I’m glad you have finally decided to rejoin me”  
  
Moran gulped, he had heard that particular tone of voice before but luckily it had never been aimed at him…that is until now.  
  
“I can explain, sir”  
  
“Moran, let me ask you just the one thing”  
  
“Of course professor” he tried to close his eyes but he couldn’t nor could he ignore the increasing sense of impending doom  
  
“Did you drink from this bottle?”  
  
Professor Moriarty, waved what remained of the velvet covered bottle before him  
  
Colonel Moran thought about lying, but then he remembered what happened to Sy Douglas after he had been caught out lying, the police never did find the man’s tongue…Moran knew they wouldn’t, the professor kept it hidden in his special hiding place…funny enough a special hiding place that each and everyone who worked for the professor in any respect knew about.  
  
It was only ever mentioned in hushed tones, least you found out for yourself where it was and what exactly lay within.  
  
“I might have” he ventured.  
  
The reaction he got from the professor was unusual and in truth not what he had at all expected.  
  
Professor James Moriarty stood and laughed, not the best noise in the world to hear, worst still when you get the idea that the joke is on you.  
  
“Oh dear” Moriarty muttered in between the fits of mirth “My poor, poor Colonel Moran”  
  
By now Moran was feeling an uneasy mix of blind panic and anger  
  
“What’s so fucking funny prof?”  
  
Moriarty wiped the tears from his eyes and looked at Sebastian  
  
“You will find out Sebastian…you will find out”  
  
Once again Moriarty burst out laughing “I must record this….yes…I must keep track of all the developments”  
  
“Professor!”  
  
“Oh, don’t worry Colonel..you are purrfectly fine”  
  
Moran’s brow knotted and he felt his fists clench, he never took kindly to being mocked and now the professor appeared to be having a joke at his expense  
  
“I’m warning you professor, tell me what is so bloody funny Moriarty!”  
  
“You are about to discover my dear colonel that curiosity didn’t just kill the cat”  
  
Colonel Sebastian Moran had had enough, he forced himself to stand and tried to walk over to the professor in order to beat the truth out of him…sod the repercussions.  
  
Only his body which now reminded him just how sick he was feeling not only failed to cooperate it bloody well betrayed him, as he once again felt himself fading out of consciousness.  
  
He had no idea how long he was out, what he did know was that he felt a warmth to his side and someone had covered him with a blanket.  
  
Moran sat up gingerly and ran a hand over his face and whiskers  
  
“WHISKERS!” he thought  
  
Again he touched his face and felt sick at what his fingers were telling him, he tried pulling on what he had discovered and hissed in pain.  
  
“Fuck, what the hell”  
  
Looking around he noticed he was in fact in his own rooms that were above the professors chambers, someone..probably the professor he thought, had lit the fire..he felt the urge to stretch out in front of it and nap.  
  
“I need a mirror”  
  
Getting up slowly because he still felt groggy, he staggered to his bedroom and then for the first time in his life screamed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continuing the tale, or should that be tail.

**Curiosity Killed The Cat Colonel, part two.**

It was the warmth of the early morning sun streaming through the bedroom window that awoke the colonel, for a moment he laid there and tried his best to focus on all that had happened, surely it was all a terrible nightmare brought on by him snagging that extra strong tipple that Professor Moriarty had squirreled away.

For there was no way he, Colonel Sebastian Moran had fainted like a mere jessie.

Then as he remembered the events of the night before, he wished he hadn't and simply wanted forget it all.  It would have been nice to start that day again and not drink that damn liquid but that wasn't possible well not unless the professor had a secret time machine that he had hidden away somewhere.

He shifted his position and frowned at the infernal noises that filled his head, his pocket-watch ticked a little too loudly, the sounds of the university waking and springing to life were both a distraction and a fascination to him.

The less said about the cooing and cawing that came from the surrounding window ledges and other perches the better.

"Maybe a glass of milk will do the trick" he thought as he risked looking in his mirror once more.

The cat like whiskers were still there protruding from his cheeks though they were partly hidden by his beard and slight covering of downy hairs that now covered his entire face.

"Wait a minute..I don't even like milk" he complained.

Moran shuddered and ran his fingers through his tussled hair, stroking his ears as he did so.

"OH NO!"

He looked again at his reflection and his eyes grew wide, there atop his head rather than at the side where they should be, were a pair of large twitching cat like ears.

Colonel Moran's first instinct was to break the mirror but curiosity got a hold of him and he started to strip naked, wanting to see what else was different.

He was forced to hold onto the full length dressing room just to keep himself upright.

Every inch of his bare flesh was now covered in the same downy hair that was on his face and where this new hair met his normal body hair, it had become rather dense.

"Tis not hair" he muttered to himself "It's fucking fur"

Shaking he touched his chest and shuddered at the feel of his own fingers upon his fur and the flesh that lay beneath.

Suddenly concerned about something else he looked down and checked another very valuable part of his anatomy, he gave a sigh of relief.

"Well, glad to see you're still alright mate" he chuckled out loud.

Moran sat down on his bed and sighed heavily.

"What am I to do?"

He thought about opening the window and fleeing the university and the professor but that would be of no avail.

The professor would always find him, he always did.

The light streaming through the window caught his eye and he noticed the tiny dust particles floating about, carried along on the draft that came from his window.  The remnants of a feather from his pillow glistened in the sun as it danced before him, he tried to catch it laughing quietly to himself in sheer amusement as he failed time and time again.

Suddenly he felt puzzled, ashamed then a slow panic filled him as he realised he was acting just like a blinking cat.

Hastily he got dressed and regretted it immediately, his clothes itched and irritated his fur plus he felt too restricted.  He stood and looked in the mirror as he fumbled with his tie, only to abandon wearing it because it felt wrong having something tight around his neck.

Picking out a spare fedora he forced his ears flat and jammed the hat on his head, then grabbing a scarf he wrapped that around his face in order to hide his whiskers.

"I need to see the professor" he said to his reflection, which rather stubbornly refused to reply

"Maybe he's got a cure"

Dressed more for the depths of winter rather than a warm spring Colonel Sebastian Moran opened the room to his quarters slowly and peered out..making sure the coast was clear.

Below him the voice of Professor Moriarty drifted up, he was singing.

"Good, he's not at his lectures yet" he thought to himself.

Closing the door behind him, he silently crept downstairs and tapped on the professors door

"Come in" the professor answered.

Colonel Moran entered the private chambers quickly, closed the door and turned around to face Professor Moriarty.

"Are you feeling cold Sebastian?" Moriarty inquired.

"Yes sir, that's why I wrapped up"

"Ah, I see" Moriarty failed to hide a snigger

"Professor?"

"When getting dressed Moran, did it not occur to you to put on some shoes?"

Sebastian Moran looked down at his bare feet, well as bare as they can be when covered in fur and wiggled his toes.

"Bugger" he sighed and shuffled nervously from foot to foot.

"Is there anything else different about you, I need to know for my records" Moriarty had seated himself behind his desk and had opened one of his numerous coded journals.

"Yes professor"

"Pray tell me what it is....or do I have to guess"

"It's easier if I show you sir" Moran mumbled, as his hands sort out the woolen scarf.

Professor Moriarty sat back in his chair and watched intently as his right hand man peeled away the scarf to reveal not only the covering of fur but the cat like whiskers.

He fought back laughter at the rather pitiful expression on Moran's face, a look that got worse as he carefully removed his hat.

It took the professor a few seconds to realise what he was seeing.

"Good Lord"

Colonel Sebastian Moran stood his head bowed slightly and shuddered.

"Would you care for a drink?" the professor asked him "You look like you need one"

Moran nodded "Yes professor that would be most kind"

He went to his door and called out to a nearby maid,

"Could be so kind as to fetch me a jug of milk please, and a saucer"

Inside the private chambers, Colonel Sebastian Moran growled loudly and sunk down onto the sofa, never had felt so miserable.

A cooing at the open window caught his attention...there sat nibbling on the bird feed the professor left for them was a rather well fed pigeon, obviously a regular to the professors window.

His ears pricked forwards, his whiskers twitched and his eyes narrowed as he focused on the bird then in a quick bound he was at the window.

The sound of the turmoil brought Professor Moriarty rushing back into the room, the jug and saucer in hand.

"Colonel Moran!"

The colonel looked at him his eyes gleaming, a rather satisfied look on his blood splattered face.  The now dead bird was held tightly in his mouth,  a few dislodged feathers floated around the colonel.

"You are a very bad man, erm I mean kitty"

The professor looked flustered, something Moran had never seen before and he found it amusing

"Oh for goodness sake Sebastian, do put that poor bird down you look damned ridiculous"


End file.
